All the greenhouse gas reports look like coal

So when a plantman said

Lets set a SBTi goal

We paused the ping pong table meeting

Nature is in a bind

The birds and the bees and the trees

Are finding it hard to breathe

The power of business is bringing them to their knees

Could a pasta sauce cure this carbon boondoggle

Power the soft side mixer with a manure elixir

Run the trucks on sun

It’s SAF to say

There’s megawatts of energy to bottle

Feed the hearts minds and spirits

Of future generations

The Hole in the Wall Gang will stage a celebration

For in 20xx Newman’s Own

Will be a model of shameless regeneration.